The Singapore Dilemma
(Disclaimer: The Disclaimer for this entry is going to be very long, it would even paragraphed too.

With all due respect to Dr. Mahathir Mohamad's 1970's published Malay Dilemma this entry has no affiliation or inclination to that which he wrote. The writer is not advocating any form of Affirmative Actions in Singapore.

This entry bears no relation, or/nor is an advocacy of any National White Paper, e.g. The Singapore21 MasterPlan, the Remaking Singapore and whatever plans they want to create.

And as always...
This entry is solely based on the imaginations, thoughts and reflections of the the writer. It bear no relations, or/nor an advertisement campaign by any Governments mentioned below. Any resemblance to persons alive, dead, or anywhere were in between is purely a guilt trip, and coincidence.)

Disgust. I think that shall be the word I shall begin this entry. There is this depression I suffer every semester on the eve of my first paper. I would sit at Starbucks wondering what the hell I am doing. With my huge file and tonnes of notes, mugging with the mug of Cafe Latte.

Before I carry on, and you feel misled that my anxiety is sparked by my lack of preparation of the exams, I assure you, it is not.

I cannot help but wonder how I put myself through memorizing whatever that is needed for the exams, and simply throwing it back out during the paper. I mourn at the incompetence to test my cognitive ability and analytical skills and proficiency, rather, I see my memory being put through the ultimate test(s).

As such, I have learnt that one could simply study, and not learn.

The Irony of the Examination Model in Singapore is wierd. In forums talking about being Beyond Grades, yet when you return to school, you experience no difference or even mention on this Beyand Grades motion.

It was mere talk. Living it would be in euthopia.

I personally believe that I am Beyond Grades, I think this can explain why I would not mind, meeting up with friends, hanging out and having fun over my exam period. I have no qualms going to Starbucks etc etc. I boldly refuse to memorize my notes, even if it means I will produce a set of sensible answers yet deviated from the Marking Scheme that is worshipped by the markers.

I do not care whether I get an A or Z grade, but appreciate and believe in the process during my semester of which I derive my learning curve from. I see the process of which more important that then product. The means greater than the ends.

I can play, wake up and grouse about exams, and be cucumber cool before my papers because being Beyond Grades isn't just a verbal confession, but a lifestyle declaration. Its not about being smart or clever or knowing your work, but it is about what really matters in my life, that keeps me going.

Unfortunately, the exams do not. I am not the grade the is put upon me, I am way beyond that.

Disgust because I see that with so much talk about moving and changing directions of your education should be merely remains at talk. At ministerial level, it is taken and understood for, but by the time it fizzles down to the local schools and community, there probably isn't anything left but the same thing remaining.

Disgust because the emphasis all these years was not about development people, but perfecting systems that won't fail to place grades and constrains on the very people it was to benefit. To create a yardstick to measure us, not for us ability, but our competibility with the system. Come out the slightly distorted, and the sausage factory condemns you.

Disgust because I feel like I am only lone soul boldly and daringly living a Beyond Grades livestyle in Singapore. Where has all the courage for changes for a better life in Singapore gone?..Into the Report Books you bring home? Where has the sense of pride in your beliefs gone? ..Into a fear of being given something less and an A? Where has your ability to think and learn gone? ..Into memorizing the words of wisdom from your books, but not living it?

I celebrate the few changes made, but I scorn our resistance to be relevent to the needs of the people, but the sacred cows (i.e. the system) of those in power in our institutions.

Active Citizenship looks only good on the White Papers, but to truly experience is, how many of you are willing to step out of your comfort zone to see change that benefits your children?

How hedonistic can we be, that if we can't be gratified now, we can't press on.

Shame on us if we scorn the system, yet behave like lackeys of it, following everything that someone thinks its best for us. We haven't lost our abilities to think, but that to act, is a different story. Perhaps we are not too quick to criticize and hope the think-tanks do something about it, perhaps we simply know that nothing would be done. We are the reflection of our leaders; mere words, no actions.

We have lost ownership in our lives, behaving like we are followers of someone else's grandeur ideas lording over us.

So, are we going to wait for our principals to leave and hope someone who takes over possesses what we are looking for in our learning?

I'd always remember what the great Gandhi once said,

"We must be the change we want to see"

Are you?